This wasn’t an intended blog post, but this is happening right now, and I am battling feelings of boredom and hilarity along with the genius that has emerged from my personal rubbishness at doing things like this.  So, I have decided to blog it… live!

So:  Set up:  It’s raining, thundering and lightning-ing in Cincinnati.  My children are on holiday from school (for – like – eveeeer!).   My intended game plan for a rainy day… as ever was take them to a soft play, where they can amuse themselves for 2 hours with minimal intervention and I can read my “I am Pilgrim” book about spies and things that I don’t normally like but am enjoying.

I should have been able to tell by this ominous start, that it was going to be one of “those” days.

I am on the toilet. OK, yes I have my phone. Don't judge

I am on the toilet. OK, yes I have my phone. (The UK has been up 5 hours.. there’s a lot to catch up on)

My daughter said she didn’t want to go to soft play (horror!), something I suspect might be linked to fear of thunder.  I started to panic…visions of iPads intermingled with devils laughing and stuff flashed through my mind (note: this is simply a bad analogy for guilt).  My daughter then proactively suggested a craft morning.  She is a way better mother than I am.

Being totally honest here, I thought.  OK – all I have to do is clear the table and puts some stuff on it.  So, I did that.  Cleared the table and put all the stuff from the house that seemed worthy of the title “craft shizzle” on it.

Craft morning! Smashing it!

Craft morning! Smashing it!

Knock yourselves out (not literally) thought I, and off I got to read about spies (for anyone who’s read, I’m at the bit with the eyes…).

“Mummy!”

They needed glue.  I gave them glue.  They needed encouragement!  “That’s excellent” I said.  They needed inspiration!  “stick that foam crab on it!  “Mummy, at school we made watermelon’s on sticks!” – cool, brilliant!  Let’s do that.  “Mummy have you got any sticks?”  ARGHHHHH “No, stick some more crabs on” – hang on a minute, I’ve got some skewers from a BBQ, the one where we intended to do more than burgers and sausages!.

Sticks! For craft natch!

Sticks! For craft natch!

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These sticks fit through the gap in his teeth.. who knew!

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Watermelon on a stick. ‘Ave it!

Right time check:  We started this at 10.15.  Since the craft began we’ve made some great crabby pictures, things on sticks.  I spilt a whole glass of water on the floor, I managed one cumulative spy book chapter (in 3 attempts), I commented on some FB things and wrote this.  I gave Ben an old camera to play with and then we did a disco to the music from Trolls!

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It’s now 11.30am and we are going to a soft play. Kerpow!